Many have often asked "Is it possible for someone to love two people at the same time?" considering all the polygamous relationships around, it's easy to say; yes it is possible to love two people at the same time. But if we look into the issue in a deeper sense, there are different levels of love. So loving two people may be possible but the love for either one can be in entirely different levels.
There is what they call platonic love or brotherly love. Some relationships that started as romantic, though time can linger, become boring and eventually evolve into a mere friendship dependent on each other because of routine and Intimacy may have decreased for some reason. When this happens, the relationship begins to lack the spice and the excitement that keeps the love alive. In cases like this, temptation becomes stronger and the moment one finds someone to fill what is lacking, then this may lead to an affair. You can become confused of who you really love, the one you have been with for a long time...the one you know well and need; or is it the new apple of your eye that makes you smile and makes you feel alive? Platonic love is usually what keeps lovers together even if they have fallen out of love for each other after a long marriage.
Everyone craves for a romantic relationship. The sweet courtship stage with flowers and chocolates; dinner by candle light and dancing is still everyone's fantasy to have at any age.But as a relationship goes through time and change, the courtship fades away and you end up with forgotten anniversaries and occasional love making, when schedule allows it. You will have to admit that it gets frustrating at times and you begin to hate movies with happy endings because you begin to envy the characters in the story. You begin to feel old and unwanted, and then you meet someone who gives you special attention or gives you a compliment. Somehow you begin to crave the good feeling that that person brings to you and get the idea that you are falling in love. It doesn't mean you love the person you are committed to any less; it's just that you have found someone who makes you bring to life the romantic relationship you dream of. Romantic love is usually unrealistic and childish. If you are mature enough, you would know that the courtship time may be over but still can be relived with the proper effort from both you and your love.
Sometimes too, although the other person is not making a move on you, we all have that one big crush; our dream lover that seems unattainable. Even if you are committed to someone, there is that person you fantasize about constantly. That person is your forbidden fruit. It may be a famous actor or someone you admire from afar. But in situations when it turns out that that person has feelings for you too then that could mean trouble for your current relationship. Most infatuations start off with physical attraction that develops into lustful attractions. This kind of relationship is called passionate love and is usually reckless and dangerous because they let their passion overcome all logic and reason. In this case we end up hurting the people around us.
Now it's time to analyze just what type of love you are in with your lover...or lovers. Start to weigh your feelings, because common sense will tell you that a secret affair will not remain secret forever and you are bound to lose one of your two lovers eventually; or worse, you may end up empty handed. You have to realize who it is you can never live without and which one is the one you see yourself growing old with. Remember, the best kind of love is true love, which stands firmly on mutual tenderness, understanding, trust and respect.
By Sheila Noreen Lopez - Gamo.
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