Crush on A Shy Guy? Here's Some Advice

A Shy guy has a certain irresistible appeal (especially if he's cute). Women are intrigued by the mystery behind his quiet, and meek nature. Most guys would show their interest in a woman, the moment he sees her. But with a shy guy, It is hard to tell if he is into her or not. These are the guys who avoid eye contact or walk away when approached by a stranger. So, what can a girl do if she has a crush on a shy guy? Well, here is some useful advice.

Smile

If you do not know him that well, or at all, the first thing you can do is smile at him when you get the chance. Not in a creepy, "I like you a lot" kind of way because that would scare him off. Make it a brief friendly smile, just like you would to a friend. If you're lucky, he will smile back. This would give you a chance to introduce yourself, or start a casual conversation.

Stalker Mode On

If you do get to talk to your shy guy, he may not share much about himself right away. But, these days, all you need to know is a person's name to find out things about him. You can easily look him up online. Check out his social profile, to find out about the things that he is interested in, and the kind of people he spends time with. You can also look for things that you two have in common. This way, the next time you bump into each other, you will have something to talk about.

Ask his friends

In case you have common friends, who seem close to him, it would be helpful to ask them about him. Some things you would want to know are, What are his hobbies? What does he do for a living? Is he straight? Is he available? What kind of girls does he like? You can ask all you want, depending on how much his friend would be willing to share with you. And if you're lucky, his friend may even be willing to set you guys up for a date.

Be Visible

Now that you know what his likes and dislikes,, try joining events he would usually be in. If there is a place he likes to frequent, be there, and be seen. Do not forget to smile and say "Hi." The more often he sees you, the more familiar, and comfortable he would be around you. Also, it may catch his attention, if he sees you doing the things that he is interested in too.

Mirroring

In case you are having a hard time getting his attention, here is one psychological trick you could try. Mimic some of his movements. Don't make it too obvious though. Imitate a few of his gestures, and make sure he can see you. This would subconsciously give him a feeling of connection to you, or he would feel like he affects you.

Befriend him

Once you've become a familiar face to him, it would be easier for you to start small conversations with him, once in a while. They say lasting relationships start with friendship. So, if you like this guy, then take the time to get to know him more. Make him feel that it is okay for him to talk to you about things that interest him because you are willing to listen. Allow him to get to know things about you too if he's interested in listening as well.

What Do You Have In Common?

When you get to the point where you have established a friendship with your shy guy, you now have the opportunity to check for chemistry. Is there a common interest between the two of you? An activity, sport or hobby that you can enjoy together in the future, is important. Otherwise, you may end up boring each other to death. At this point, it is also wise to think about just how much you like this guy, before you decide to pursue him further.

Know His Sensitivity

In case you are having trouble communicating with your shy guy, here's another psychological approach. There are three ways that people understand things based on their sensitivity. Some people are more sensitive about how things around them look (visual sensitive), some react to how things sound (auditory sensitive), while some are more aware of how things make them feel (emotionally sensitive).

Observe how he describes things. For example, if you are talking about a walk on the beach, a visual sensitive guy would talk about the color of the water, the birds flying overhead, or any other things that can be seen. An auditory sensitive guy would mention the sound of the waves crashing or the howling of the wind. While an emotionally sensitive person would describe how the experience made him feel. You would hear words like sad, calm, or peaceful from this guy. Once you've recognized his sensitivity, you can adjust the way you talk to him. Communicating with him by taking his sensitivity in consideration is the best way he would understand you.

Compliment him

Since you're reading on, I assume you like your shy guy. So, here's a sure fire way to make him like you. Whenever you see him do something good or impressive, compliment him. Everyone likes hearing good things about themselves, so throw in a few praises now and then. Just make sure you do not over do it. And you have to be sincere about every compliment.

Show him you Care

The moment you feel that your friendship is starting to grow, you should take steps to make him feel special. You do not want to be friend zoned, do you? Little things like sending him a good morning text every day, or asking him how his day was, would go a long way. Let him know that you are there for him, by being attentive to what he says. Take every chance you get to show him that you care for him. Let him know that he is important to you and that he is not just another one of your friends.

Be honest

You may come to a point where he would ask you about your intentions, or you may feel that you are ready to tell him that you like him. When this time comes, be honest. Let him know that you like him, and don't forget to let him know the reasons why you do so. Shy guys are the way they are for a reason. They may lack self-confidence, they may have been hurt before, or maybe both. Knowing someone likes them would be nice to hear. But, how they would respond would depend on whether he likes you too or not.

Don't rush him

Lastly, if you like a shy guy, take things slow. Aggressive women may intimidate most shy guys, so try not to come on too strong. You have to do things at his pace, or you have no chance with him at all.


By Sheila Noreen Lopez